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[Chiyomira’s Corner]
Hahaha, PG-13 warning. Mom and Big Sis attempting to give the sex talk~
Chapter 36: Love, You’ve Come ah
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Song Liang Zhuo lifted his leg and lightly kicked Ha Pi with a smile: “Xiao Qi’s darling, what are you afraid of?”
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Xiao Qi lowered her head to look and took a deep breath, saying: “Wasn’t he white? How did he become so gray?”
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Song Liang Zhuo put Xiao Qi on the ground and pulled her hand, leading her to go inside. Ha Pi bite Xiao Qi’s trousers as if he were holding a grudge and refused to let go. Every step Xiao Qi took he would be dragged along the floor.
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Xiao Qi could not step forward with one of her legs. Wrinkling her nose, she said to Song Liang Zhuo: “You carry him.”
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Song Liang Zhuo frowned: “I’ll get a rash.”
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“Then what do we do?”
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Song Liang Zhuo lifted his leg to poke Ha Pi onto Xiao Qi’s legs and princess carried Xiao Qi into the courtyard.
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All the people in the fu seemed really happy. Xiao Qi originally felt that there were not many people in the fu, but right now with them all intentionally gathering on the road, it looked like there was more. Everyone saw Song Liang Zhuo carrying Xiao Qi, Xiao Qi’s legs clasping Ha Pi, and all smiled kindly as they hurried to work their respective matters.
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Xiao Qi also originally didn’t feel anything, but when she got to the door and saw Auntie Feng’s warm smile, her face got a bit red. Xiao Qi recalled what Song Liang Zhuo said before he left. That if he could return they would get married. She know, it definitely meant when he came back they would consummate the marriage.
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Xiao Qi wasn’t afraid of consummating the marriage, rather, she even looked forward to it a bit.
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Mrs. Mei told her before, consummating marriage was a very blessed and happy event. It’s just like being bitten by an ant, then the entire body will feel comfortable. After consummating there’d be a chance to have a little darling, and can also obtain the husband’s dear love.
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Xiao Qi had looked through the picture pamphlet before. It’s just taking off all the clothes and sleep, then the man will be like that.
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Heehee, Xiao Qi smoothed her lips as she giggled. So shy!
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Xiao Qi lifted her eyes to look at Song Liang Zhuo and Ha Pi who was resting on her legs shook a bit. She smiled: “I’m not scared.”
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“Hm?” Song Liang Zhuo found it incomprehensible.
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Xiao Qi shot a glance at Song Liang Zhuo again while blushing. Only when she was placed onto the stool did she give some of her attention to Ha Pi who was lying above her legs.
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Ha Pi was indeed angry. Even after they entered the room he still hasn’t released his mouth, and the whole time he also continued to whine ‘wuuwuu’.
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Xiao Qi bent her waist to pat Ha Pi’s head and coaxed: “Big Sister was busy recently. Ha Pi is a good boy, go to sleep, alright? Did you go hungry?”
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Song Liang Zhuo’s mouth twitched and went outside to order someone to prepare bath water.
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“Official Song, Ha Pi became ugly!”
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Ha Pi’s ears were completely black. Xiao Qi rubbed it for a long time but it was still black, she didn’t know what was stuck on it. If it weren’t for the fact that Ha Pi pulled at her trousers and refused to let go, Xiao Qi would’ve mistaken this as someone else’s lost little stray dog.
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“Does Xiao Qi know how to take care of him? Otherwise it’s best if we sent him back.” Song Liang Zhuo felt a bit of pity about this rare, long-furred dog. If he continues to be taken care of so sloppily and loses his fur and gets stained by ugly colors, he will no longer be so liked.
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Xiao Qi didn’t oppose it. Rubbing Ha Pi’s head, she thought for a while then pursed her lips as she stood up: “Then I’ll just send him back to Mom. Urgh, what is this? So sticky!”
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Xiao Qi knitted her brows as she grabbed Ha Pi’s two back legs and put him onto the floor. Apologetically using her foot to rub Ha Pi, she said: “I’ll carry you tomorrow, ok? I’ll buy some meat for Ha Pi to eat, ok?”
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Auntie Feng lead two servants carrying hot water in and rushed towards Ha Pi with a bent waist and waving her fingers. Auntie Feng picked up Ha Pi and said smiling: “I didn’t give it a bath these past few days. Madam and da ren should wash up and head to bed early. Little Gray will sleep with me for now.”
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Xiao Qi watched dumbstruck as Auntie Feng carried Ha Pi out. Ha Pi even leaned on Auntie Feng’s shoulder and cutely barked towards Xiao Qi. Xiao Qi was a bit envious.
Because of the incident with the thunderstorms, I’m thinking.
Song Liang Zhuo took off his outer garments. Seeing Xiao Qi was still staring at the closed door, he thought she was nervous and warmly said: “Xiao Qi, go wash up first.”
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“Ok.” Xiao Qi dazedly walked to the screen and took off half of her clothes before she wrapped herself up again and ran out to ask: “Who’s Little Gray?”
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“Probably Ha Pi.”
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“Oh.” Xiao Qi turned and walked back behind the screen. Jumping into the bathtub, after a long time she finally got angry and slapped the water: “Ha Pi isn’t called Little Gray, Little Gray is for calling little bunnies!”
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Song Liang Zhuo exhaustedly rubbed his forehead and didn’t say anything.
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Xiao Qi soaked for a little while, then came out and saw that Song Liang Zhuo had already fallen asleep on the table. Xiao Qi thought for a bit, and still poked him in the end, asking quietly: “Are you still going to take a bath?”
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Song Liang Zhuo squinted as he nodded, then exhaled and walked inside. Xiao Qi twisted her head to look at the screen, then at the bed. Then she poked her head out to look at the little couch in the other room, but in the end still obediently climbed onto the bed.
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The water was a bit cold. Song Liang Zhuo was quite tired as he washed up and randomly put on a long gown before heading to the bedside.
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Xiao Qi was a little nervous. When Song Liang Zhuo lifted the mosquito net and got inside, she couldn’t help but quiver a bit. Song Liang Zhuo glanced at Xiao Qi who was biting her thumb as she stared at him and got up to put out the candle before lying back down on the bed.
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Xiao Qi sucked on her finger with her eyes wide. She felt Song Liang Zhuo lie down and tug at the blanket, then a hand seized her waist.
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Xiao Qi squeaked as she sucked her thumb and nervously waited for have a day, but didn’t see Song Liang Zhuo take off her clothes. Xiao Qi twisted her head to look at Song Liang Zhuo but couldn’t see anything.
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Did she have to take them off herself? Xiao Qi thought with knitted brows.
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Xiao Qi waited quietly for another while. Seeing other than the sound of breathing, Song Liang Zhuo didn’t make another sound, she couldn’t help but lightly shake his arm.
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“Hm? What is it?” Song Liang Zhuo asked half-asleep.
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Nothing much! Xiao Qi pouted and unhappily humphed. Official Song is so boring, scaring people for nothing!
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Xiao Qi angrily withdrew her thumb and wiped it clean on Song Liang Zhuo’s chest. After being quiet for a while, she spoke again unhappily: “Are you tired?”
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Xiao Qi heard a soft chuckled and the arm around her waist tightened and drew her into a warm embrace.
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“You haven’t fallen asleep ah!?” Xiao Qi exclaimed in shock.
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“I’m about to fall asleep.” Song Liang Zhuo lightly sighed. He kissed Xiao Qi’s forehead and warmly said: “Go to sleep, it’s late.”
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Xiao Qi wanted to ask, you’re not getting married with me? But on second thought, Mom, Mrs. Mei always said to be reserved and aloof. She, Qian Xiao Qi, seemed to never have been reserved before, so she should try being reserved once. Anyways, anyways, she’s not in a hurry, right?
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“Then you go to sleep.” Xiao Qi hugged Song Liang Zhuo’s waist and yawned.
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Song Liang Zhuo was truly tired. Giving a soft chuckle, he closed his eyes. No long after, he already fell asleep.
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Everything returned to usual. Lu Liu had also returned. Song Liang Zhuo would wake up everyday to go to the government office and occasionally he would bring back some side dishes from Charming Luster House for Xiao Qi.
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Ha Pi was sent back to Qian fu by Xiao Qi. When Mrs. Mei saw Ha Pi again, she was shocked to the point a grape got stuck in her throat. Luckily, Pan Di was nearby and with a pat of the palm was able to force it back out.
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Mrs. Mei patted her chest as she hastily inhaled. Pointing with a trembling finger she asked: “Ha Pi, how did Ha Pi become like this, hah? It offends Heaven and reason!”
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Perhaps because she had seen him everyday, Xiao Qi didn’t feel like Ha Pi was ugly to the point it would scare people that much, but she did feel guilt. Xiao Qi crumpled the hem of her clothes and mumbled: “Um, probably because he didn’t bath. At home, there’s no fragrance cream.”
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Mrs. Mei swept a glance over Xiao Qi who had began pouting immediately after walking in and asked with her eyes squinted into curves: “Qi er is unhappy?”
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Xiao Qi pouted even more unhappily. She went over and whispered to herself for a long time before gloomily asking: “Mom, am I really ugly?”
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“Huh? Who said that? They must have gone blind from old age!” Mrs. Mei rubbed her own large eyes, her slender brows indignant.
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Mrs. Mei poked Xiao Qi’s brow and said: “It’s a bit mild, not as black and slender as Mom’s, but what’s called simply swept beauty*? Only Xiao Qi’s type of brows are cute yet still doesn’t lose in beauty!”
Simply swept beauty refers to a simple and elegant makeup style.
Pan Di’s lips twitched as she said: “Mom, simply swept beauty doesn’t mean that.”
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Mrs. Mei shot a glare at Pan Di: “It’s close enough.”
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Mrs. Mei pinched Xiao Qi’s face, leaving faint pink fingerprints on the porcelain-white soft flesh. Mrs. Mei was speechless: “Look, look at it. What a wonderful cheek, just a pinch can pinch out water. Who was it that lacked such eyesight? If Xiao Qi isn’t pretty, then Tongxu doesn’t have any women.”
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Xiao Qi blinked her eyes: “Why wouldn’t there be woman?”
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“The rest will be ugly as men ah!” Pan Di propped up her chin as she giggled.
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“Oh.” This is a lie, Xiao Qi thought silently. That Cai Yun is prettier than her. Xiao Qi lowered her head to look at her tiny little chest and thought with a pout, and she even has more meat than her.
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Thinking of Cai Yun, Xiao Qi became a bit worried and hurriedly asked: “Mom, where’s Lady Cai Yun?”
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Mrs. Mei and Pan Di shared a look and proudly lifted her chin: “Mom sent her to the store to help look at the bills. Haha, this way she won’t encounter you or your family’s husband. Also ah,” Mrs. Mei rubbed Pan Di’s stomach and said with a giddy smile: “Qi er, work hard! Your Second Sister is expecting.”
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“Eh, you’ve gotten pregnant?!” Xiao Qi’s eyes widened with surprise. She carefully moved over to stroke her stomach and smiled: “Second Sister is amazing.”
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Mrs. Mei sweetly smiled: “Qi er should also grasp the chance. When the time comes and there are two, haha, it’ll also let Mom celebrate.”
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Xiao Qi flattened her mouth with grievances and looked at Pan Di, then glanced at Mrs. Mei again. Sniffling, she said: “Mom, Official Song won’t sleep sleep* with me.”
Xiao Qi says it in a baby-ish way that’s clear she doesn’t know what she’s talking about.
The state of affairs was serious.
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Mrs. Mei closed the door and pondered perplexed for a while before speaking: “You two, you haven’t consummated the marriage yet?”
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Xiao Qi shook her head: “But we still sleep together ah.”
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Pan Di sucked in a breath and said in shock: “He won’t rise up?”
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Mrs. Mei glared at Pan Di. After thinking a while, she also got a bit worried: “He wouldn’t really have that illness, right? How could that be? When Song Liang Zhuo proposed marriage, did he say anything about having an illness?”
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Pan Di wringed her wrists: “If he had an illness he’ll definitely keep it secret and under wraps. Humph, bullying our Old Qian family’s youngest! Concealing even such a big problem.”
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Xiao Qi blink and blinked her eyes: “What doesn’t rise?”
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Mrs. Mei gave a light cough and indicated for Pan Di to explain. Xiao Qi shifted her gaze to Pan Di. Pan Di lifted up the tea and drank a mouthful before lowering her eyes.
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Xiao Qi became anxious: “Is it fatal?”
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Pan Di was shocked to the point she choked. After thinking about it for a moment she said: “That, that isn’t. I have to ask you, why won’t Official Song consummate marriage with you? He didn’t touch a single finger of you?”
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Xiao Qi bit her lips and said with her face flushed: “At the start I didn’t want to. Later, when there was an epidemic outside the city, he said he would consummate marriage with me when he came back. But that night when he came back he was really tired. He hugged me and just fell asleep. And then, and then, he just hugs me and sleeps. He, ah, he even kisses me.” Xiao Qi rubbed her lips as she lowered her head.
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“Does he have, have……” Pan Di was uncomfortable to the point her face was red as the clouds of dawn.
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“Does he have what?” Xiao Qi was at a loss.
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Mrs. Mei continued the struggle: “Basically down there, there, does he have that thing there.”
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“What thing?” Xiao Qi suddenly recalled the picture pamphlet glanced through. In it, the naked man had a very ugly stick below his body. She said with a red face: “That ah, I, I never touched before!”
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This time, even Mrs. Mei’s face turned red. Mrs. Mei and Pan Di shared gazes for a long time. Xiao Qi didn’t know what they were communicating about and just stood there dazed. Mrs. Mei pulled Xiao Qi very mysteriously into the room in the neighboring courtyard.
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Credits: Translated by Chiyomira, Edited by Sonia
Glossary
Haha 😂 the mother and daughter pair is so funny!
Mmhm 🙂
This is hilarious! What life was like before the internet folks….
Yup yup. Haha, what comes next will be even more hilarious.
omg LOLOLOL
thanks for the chapter xD
You’re welcome XD
You had me standing on a crowded train, laughing so hard I had to get off at the next stop. “Basically down there, there, does he have that thing there.”? Really?! So in love with these characters.Thanks for the chapter.
family of females entering into discussion stage
This is too good! The birds and the bees-talk!